Valentine’s Day and love is in the air

Posted on February 10, 2008. Filed under: Why I write | Tags: , , , , , , |

By Joy A. Kennelly

I’ve had a love/hate relationship with this holiday. Oftentimes planning singles events and parties for all my friends to attend. Sometimes heartbroken. Sometimes happy. Sometimes content.

This year I decided to celebrate and send all my family little love gifts. I found the cutest toys for some of my nieces and son at Toy Jungle over on Pier Avenue right down the street from me in Hermosa Beach of all places. Surprise, surprise!

The woman working there was extremely helpful and lead me around the store pulling out a variety of things all the children in my life might like which was very nice. When have you ever had personalized service like that before at any of the larger stores?

The whole experience made me so happy! I’m sure my gifts will make everyone happy too! Tonight I blitzed around visiting a bunch of places to get the rest of my family some fun Valentine’s stuff too. I love giving gifts! It makes me very happy to share my love in that way.

I’m also shipping the soldiers I gave gifts to at Christmas a bunch of Valentine’s treats because they probably will appreciate being remembered too! Who knows if they get presents either?

I just am setting my intention to share love with people I love to build better relationships and communication. Hopefully this will just be the first step to many more loving relationships. Maybe this time even one of the soldiers might respond? Wouldn’t that be lovely?

On another note, yesterday I had the best evening. I experienced a wonderful full body massage from Martha over at Spa Riviera with a little hot stone therapy thrown in as a treat which made me feel so much better! I felt like my old self again after that! Who knew how much I really needed to be loved on that way? She’s so strong and caring it really felt nice to receive the treatment.

I was in such good spirits when I left I had a great time at my friend’s friend’s party later on. I met some really nice, cool, hip people too. What totally cracked me up was filming a slow mo mooning by one of our male buds who impromptu, decided to drop his drawers for whatever reason.

Then that inspired my other friend to create her own “dancin’ bootie” mooning video too! I haven’t laughed that hard in a long time. They both totally cracked me up! I’ll admit the rum drink probably loosened me up a bit too. But it was just one people.

I really needed a fun party like that. I met the most interesting producer named Federico who was actually a very accomplished painter before getting into film. His latest film, Song of Songs, was nominated for an Emmy this past year and explores the question of whether or not long-term commitments are possible for our generation.

(At least that’s what I gathered from watching the trailer!) Very interesting, creative guy and very insightful too. I really enjoyed learning more about his process, experience and thoughts on love and creating the film.

What was so weird is that earlier that day I had received an email from Michele Armstrong whose Armstrong Method workshop I’m taking this weekend, asking me to set an intention.

Mine is to have a love relationship in my life. Then I go to the party and meet someone who has just completed a whole movie on love relationships! Go figure.

I explained to Federico a recent situation I had experienced with a girlfriend where I could plainly see she wasn’t responding in explosive anger to me, but to a previous life experience from her childhood which gave me the capacity to not take it personally.

He thought I was very wise in the way I handled it which made me feel good. I haven’t really shared that experience with too many people, but he felt like a safe person to share with. Now you know too!

Maybe all those love/relationship books and seminars and therapy I’ve taken over the years are all starting to pay off? I always did think it would be fun to create a relationship conference with all my favorite love authors and therapists. Maybe one day…

I still think there are certain issues I probably need to look at to help me achieve the love I want to have in my life, but maybe the breakthroughs will happen in tomorrow’s session at the workshop. She’s similar to Chris Howard in certain respects, but very different too. I do find writing about things very therapeutic too. Hence all my blogs.

Back to the party.

The other thing Federico mentioned, is that they found interviewing over 150 people all over the world is that most of our hang-ups with love stem from our childhood years ages 1-7 which I found very interesting. I don’t remember much of my childhood so I have no idea what that means for me, but I’d like to explore it.

I heard that the older we become, the more likelihood childhood issues will come up because we’re in a place where we can actually handle them enough to work through them and heal.

I know I’m happier than I’ve been in a long time because I really think God has been healing parts of my life that I’ve been avoiding for a long time which is freeing. I’ve always felt very comfortable with my adoption experience, but recently just being able to write about my feelings over the way I feel the adoptive parents treat me has also been very freeing.

What else did I want to say? Let’s see. Oh yeah.

Today one of the exercises Michele had us do towards the end of the day was turn to a blank page and write at the top, What obstacles are in my life that are preventing me from having the life I was meant to live (or something like that. I’m too tired to double-check and you should have been there if you really want the full scoop!:)

Then she had us clear our minds. Then we came up and picked an angel card with a saying on it. We then went back to our seat, sat there with our eyes closed until everyone had a card. Then, when she said to, we turned the card over and wrote down what was the first thing that came to mind when we saw the inscription and image.

Mine was Angel Therapy and said something to the effect I was supposed to let the angels carry my cares and burdens to the heavens for me. The first thing that came to mind was I needed to Trust God more. I also realized I have friends in my life who are like angels to me because they really support, encourage and pray for me (in essence, carrying my burdens to the heavens for me.)

Lastly, the card made me realize I could probably use a little more therapy to get some of the last few things I need to work on resolved. Isn’t that funny? One of these days I’ll stop going, but for now, I’m going to pursue more because I find therapy very therapeutic! LOL

I find if I dig it up and it’s revealed, then I can deal with it and move through the hurt and pain or anger to heal. And that’s what it’s all about baby! I’m damned and determined to root out whatever is blocking me from having true love in my life because I really want a wonderful loving male partner to share my life with.

It’s just so much more fun and rewarding to have a love relationship in your life! Plus, I love sex!

I love this weekend too because I’m able to focus on myself rather than everyone else’s needs and it feels great. I feel much lighter and happier as a result. I could have spent time with another friend at her dinner party tonight, but knew I’d be way too tired to enjoy being around a bunch of people I didn’t know. Also, that I’d probably end up helping and I wasn’t in the mood. Too tired!

What’s also fun about the workshop this weekend is that a woman I see at all the various functions in town is also taking this course and she’s a very cool, evolved person. I’m glad I’m finally able to get to know her a little better. I love these types of conferences because of the amazing people you meet along the way. I feel you can never know or grow too much!

Who knows? Maybe one of these days I’ll know so much I’ll actually begin to share it as a speaker? Stranger things have happened!

I’m absolutely exhausted because I stayed out way too late at that party last night and woke up way too early too. However, I must say it was definitely worth it because I really needed the stress relief of just goofing around and being silly with friends – old and new.

Watch out! You just might receive a chocolate moon-o-gram in your phone one of these days! Just kidding!

Happy early Valentine’s Day!

Sending you lots of love and chocolate!

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    Emotions I feel surrounding my adoption, books I read and other experiences in life

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